Friday, August 7, 2015

Hearing God's Call in the Midst of Chaos

Hearing God’s Call in the Midst of Chaos

Marilyn Bellonci

The bottom had fallen out of my cozy little life. Separation from my husband, the loss of our home, and personal bankruptcy had shaken me to my core. However, I knew I had to keep myself together for the sake of my young son. I was struggling to support him on a minimum wage income. On the brink of homelessness, I felt desperate and alone.

I was raised a Southern Baptist but hadn’t seen the inside of a church in almost thirty years. Yet, seemingly out of nowhere, I felt a deep desire to talk to a priest – not a preacher, but a priest. Strange, I thought for a Southern Baptist, but the idea kept growing and nagging at me for quite a few weeks. Finally I got up the courage to call the Catholic Church and make an appointment to see the priest. He listened quietly to my saga. Then he told me how much God loves me, prayed with me, and said he would continue to pray for me. He introduced me to one of the nuns of the parish, a very special woman who would eventually change my life. I felt at home there and was invited to come back any time.

On the way home from the church, my 10 year old car broke down in the middle of Maitland Boulevard on the bridge over I-4. I was stranded in the middle of rush hour traffic in 95 degree heat, surrounded by angry drivers who were honking horns, cursing, and shaking their fists at me. Not only did I have no way to contact anyone since cell phones were not yet common, but I also had no one to contact for help. I began to cry – once again overwhelmed by LIFE.

Then I remembered where I had just been, and the soft-spoken priest who had reminded me of God’s love. A feeling of peace came over me. For the first time in many, many years I began to pray. “Jesus, if you can hear me, please help me.” Literally within seconds... a light blue pickup truck pulled up in front of me. An older gentleman with white hair got out and asked if I needed help. He raised the hood of the car and seemed to know just where to look. He pulled out the fuel filter. He said it was clogged and he couldn’t unclog it. BUT he had been to the auto parts store that morning and “SOMETHING” had told him to pick up a spare fuel filter!! Amazingly, that spare fuel filter fit my car, and within a few minutes it was running again. After thanking the man and wrote out a check to reimburse him and drove home - rescued by an angel in a blue pickup. The check was never cashed.

I went back to that church the following Sunday and every Sunday after that for years. I learned about a God who loved me just as I was – broken and imperfect, a God who became my personal friend and confidante, who taught me to “Be still and know that He is God.” I know that He holds me in the palm of His hand. He has brought many little miracles to my life.

Since that period of time, my life has been anything but smooth. Circumstances changed, both at the church and in my own life. Eventually I stopped attending every Sunday. Sometimes I still lose my way, but God continues to call me in the most amazing and personal ways. Now he has led me to the Church of the Good Shepherd where I feel I have found a home. And if I should become lost again, I know my Shepherd will find me. I know I will hear Him calling even in the midst of my life’s chaos.

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